Archives: What’s Happening in HTG Town

HTG Hollywood Police Station

“To protect and to serve.” That is the motto for the “finest law enforcement agents in the land” operating right here in HTG Hollywood. Led by Chief of Police Carl O. Winslow, the streets of our fine city have never been safer. But, alas, it has been double duty for Chief Winslow lately to keep the force stocked with officers. Occasionally a member of the squad is hired to act in a movie, removing them from active duty. It would take more money to finance more officers. Any holes in the roster would go unfilled without the input of cash.

Thankfully, donations recently have allowed the roster to be filled. Not only that, but a new 5-member SWAT team has been hired, along with gear and a vehicle.

“I think I’m leaving the city in good hands” commented Abe Vigoda on his retirement. “I can take a walk in the park now with peace of mind.”

A get-to-know-your-police cookies and punch gathering has been scheduled for Wednesday afternoon. All are invited to come by and wish our brave law officers good luck as they prepare to hit the streets.

The holiday season has once again proved to be fruitful releasing days for films, according to newly released box office figures. From December 26 through January 8 the BO amounted to a whopping $996,578,857. Box office staffers are looking into this period being the best in HTG history.

“If it isn’t,” remarked an HTG accountant, “it’s still unbelievable that nearly a billion dollars was spent at theatres over a two week time span. That’s more money than most people can comprehend. I’m having trouble with it as is, and I handle financial figures for a living!”

Four studios found their films getting a total of hundred million dollars or more over the two weeks. The top studio at that time was Ship of Fooles and $318,816,592 received for four films. TCW Excessive Force alone garnered $140,772,636.

“If someone says that they don’t watch wrestling,” continued the accountant, “then the next guy is, from those figures.”

The second highest grossing studio for the two weeks was Checkmate Pictures at $213,876,799. However, unlike the four films involved with SoF, CP made its holiday cash with just one movie, The Ballad of Mike Roulette.

(These comparisons do not include the CP/SoF cooperation in Dick Tracy: Domino Midnight, which got $58,922,458 over the two weeks.)

“Thank goodness no new films were released on the 2nd” the accountant stated. “That made this process go smoother. It’s still a tedious process, but a necessary one.”

With the holidays gone, does the accountant feel that these enormous box office figures will return soon?

“I don’t know if even the Memorial Day weekend can match this. But if it does, watch out. That’s a lot of money in circulation. Who knows what those studio heads will be buying after they finish with their producer payouts. They do tend to be a nutty bunch.”