Archives: What’s Happening in HTG Town

With more than an hour since his last post, HTG Hollywood’s favorite son Ritchie Steven has not yet made that groundbreaking 4000th post.

“I’m a bit worried” stated a customer at Flip Brothers Pizzeria, co-owned by RS and his brother PJ Flip. “I might have to buy up all of this Flip merchandise that the pizza place offers. If RS has kicked the bucket, God forbid, the value of this stuff will skyrocket.”

“I eat a lot of almonds” commented Lucian Carter. “Almonds are the healthiest thing in the company vending machine.”

Is Ritchie all right? Or is he just waiting for a topic to make his 4000th post a noteworthy one? Stay tuned to various HTG locations for further developments with this situation.

HTG Hollywood luminary Ritchie Steven, one of the notable Flip Brothers, has reached a milestone today that has the town buzzing with excitement.

“RS is one post away from 4000 on the message board,” remarked Ship of Fooles head Lucian Carter.

“Egads” was all that Miracle Pictures chief Marlowe could manage to say.

One of the founders of our fair city, Ritchie has been a citizen for 39 1/2 months. That makes approximately 100 posts on the forum per month, making RS the top poster in HTG Hollywood. Fellow FM alumni Sureshot and Marlowe follow him with 2056 and 1755 posts.

“S***, that’s a lot of posts,” exclaimed an HTG_Chat visitor who asked to remain anonymous.

“The new phone books are here! The new phone books are here!” screamed gas station attendant NJ54.

Congratulations to Ritchie Steven on this accomplishment. We’re looking forward to him posting another 4000 messages in the future.

HTG Hollywood’s premier sports entertainment television show is preparing for an explosive 90-minute finale, according to sources at the Rogue Net television network. A huge tag team match will be taking place. And, to top the event, the long overdue meeting between wrestling legend Hulk Hogan and TCW mainstay Tommy Cornell will take place.

Will the Hulkster be able to keep his crumbling personal life away from the arena? Does his impending divorce from wife Linda and the criminal charges against son Nick have any influence on what will occur?

“The Immortal One has been able to keep his personal life away from the ring,” remarked a Rogue Net insider. “He’s always been the cream that rises to the top. I don’t think that what’s going on at home will affect his match with Cornell. The only thing that concerns me right now is that Hawaiian Bryan will be in the building. Who knows what that nutcake will be up to.”

Another source was more candid with his feelings.

“To be the man, you have to beat the man. Can you smell what I’m cooking? Oh, yeah.”

TCW Presents Total Wrestling appears Tuesday nights on Rogue Net. TCW’s next pay-per-view, Where Angels Fear to Tread, is slated for December.

A Note from your EIC

Some of you are aware that I lost heat here at the ol’ house and have been staying at a hotel until my furnace could be fixed. The guys are here (at the house) working on it today. Hopefully everything will be up and running (and warm) soon. I’ll be able to return to the news that affects you and HTG Hollywood shortly. Thanks for waiting!

HTG Hollywood officials are lauding the most recent of the city’s Thanksgiving parades, despite an unfortunate incident regarding Japanese tourists and one of the entries to the annual procession. Despite the city not having an official leader, visitors to the parade route seemed to enjoy what was offered.

“I especially enjoyed the Judge Dredd float,” declared a young watcher. “It’s too bad that Ron Perlman couldn’t take part of the display, but I think Dave Foley did a spendid job. I don’t care if he’s Canadian.”

The award for the best parade entry was given this year to The Dance of the Mullets, a music and dance-filled march sponsored by Joe Dirt star David Spade. Three dozen Rockette-style dancers, dressed in sequin tights and donned in blonde mullets, thrilled spectators with their high-kicking salute to hair bands of the 80’s.

“Dude, when they danced to Poison, I almost hurled!” shouted an excited parade visitor.

This year’s parade was the first one not marshalled by Adam West, former mayor of HTG Hollywood. Recently resigning his position, the acting veteran is said to be resting in an undisclosed location near the city.

“We’ll be announcing the process for finding a new mayor soon,” a city official informed this news source. “Until then, we’re making do the best we can.”

As was reported earlier in this news source, prolific HTG producer Bryan Bishop has recently purchased an island off the coast of our fair city. Dubbed “Hawaiian Bryan’s Adventure Island,” the new landmark is still under construction, but promises to be a site as notable as Lake Ohnasasi and the wash west of the HTG town dump.

Pleasure boaters, close to the island, have noticed that a large number of unknown people have been arriving on Bishop’s island. Unlike the numerous construction workers seen over the previous weeks, these newcomers are dressed in what appears to be matching uniforms. Mansion servants? Employees for the proposed hotel/resort? This is not yet known. Calls to Bryan Bishop’s office have not been returned.

However, there is one thing of note. Yachters who venture too close to the island have been “run off” by Bishop’s security force. Apparently the HTG citizen treasures his privacy. So, in the mean time, it is advised that all residents of the city keep a wide berth of the isle. Hopefully, in near time, Bishop will reveal all that he has developed on his island and make room for what will certainly be many happy tourists.

First he was an actor, including time as television’s Batman. He has been featured in two HTG films, Puneet and Dark Shadows 2. He had already transferred his time into politics, running HTG Hollywood since autumn of 2004. And now, he is retiring.

Mayor Adam West officially resigned Monday morning, less than 24 hours after ending his unexplained two-week absence with the disclosure of his emergency stay in a rehabilitation clinic that treats substance abuse and psychiatric problems.

Mr. West’s resignation closes a controversial chapter in this town’s political history, which has included rumors of corruption and the possible kidnapping of a fellow television legend. Just two months ago, the mayor was seen around town dressed in his old Caped Crusader outfit. Witnesses claimed that the 79-year-old West claimed to be the actual Batman, and was out “fighting dastardly villains.”

A representative for the former city leader said that his client’s decision was an anguished one: “Mr. West has concluded that public confidence is so eroded by ongoing circumstances that the only responsible action is to step down. He does so with great regret and with apologies to his supporters, to the people of HTG Hollywood and to his family and friends.”

It remains unclear whether a permanent replacement for Mr. West would be chosen through a special election or by some other means, but a city hall insider vowed to clarify that question in the coming days.

“We needed closure,” the city source said. “Now Mr. West can spend time in the comfort of his home dressed however he choses.”

Citizens of HTG Hollywood are advised to stay tuned to the various news sources as more details develop.

Rumors have flooded from city hall that HTG Hollywood’s top citizen, Mayor Adam West, is no longer the town’s leader. Nothing has been confirmed as of yet. Stay tuned to HTG news sources for details when they are made available.

In less than a week, the time that the Happening staff was absent from HTG Hollywood, a new development has emerged from the depths of the water off of our fair city’s coast. What is this change in the town’s geography? Who is responsible?

Here is what the Happening staff knows, until someone can put the remaining pieces together.

Bryan Bishop has spent a whopping $1 billion HTG buckerinos to buy his own island. Named “Hawaiian Bryan’s Adventure Island,” the private spot holds a few locations so far. To the west is Bryan’s zoo, where he will hold an unlimited number of pets. Going to the east and driving past his glass garage, we can find Bryan’s mansion, the most luxurious of any on the HTG landscape. Rumors of what the mansion will finally hold are so far unfounded (and in some cases, frightening). Going just a tad further east is Bryan’s office, including a location to publish his newsblog. Turning south, a private airstrip allows Bryan to go to and from the mainland. And to the northeast, defending the HTG citizen’s land from intruders, a guard tower stands. Undeveloped land is spotted across the island. Rumor has it that a hotel will be built for lucky visitors.

The purchase of the island has brought Bryan Bishop from the status of billionaire to a mere millionaire. But the prolific producer has multiple projects in the works, plus films still producing cash at HTG theatres now. Further rumors have it that Bryan will be taking over a certain abandoned property in town, but that has not been announced yet. It should be no time before Bryan is once again among the richest in HTG Hollywood.

When’s the grand opening party?

The Happening staff would like to apologize for the lack of frequent updates over the last 5 weeks. Marlowe has been spending a lot of time out of town doing this and that. He has one more week of that, then he’ll be home on a regular basis. He hopes. In the mean time, enjoy his work updating the HTG Box Office, the talent page, plus a couple other things. And check out the new blog by Dr. Dirty. His tag is “Hollywood is a dirty place and we’re gonna clean up the streets one rumor at a time! Watch out HTG!” Good luck, Doc.

Always among the frontrunners at the HTG box office, Flip Brothers Studio has a lot of activity planned for the theatres over the next months.

Among the films slated for FB release is December’s Durham Red, the Random FX production of a Guillermo del Toro film. The cast includes Gerard Butler and Lena Heady. Initial ads for the feature have received a “very wicked” response.

Daniel Thomas, producer of HTGTV’s JAG series, is returning to his Beautiful Life franchise with the upcoming Beautiful Life: Romeo & Romeo. The film will present the HTG debuts of Prison Break’s Marshall Allman and New York native Will Rothhaar. Hettie MacDonald is expected to direct again and will bring the story to America this time. The first Beautiful Life film has grossed just over 80 million dollars.

Tagged for a 2008 release is The Return of Tony Diamonds: Volume 1 by old-time HTG resident Shane Alexander. Flip Brothers execs are keeping tight-lipped on the details of the film, but one insider stated that “it might be the first in a new original series of films.”

The Flip Brothers are kings of the HTG comic franchises. Further sequels for Superman are in the works. According to a FB source, “The next Superman film will feature the origin of Wonder Woman, who will be the number two star.” It is being co-plotted by current producer Kris Greet and studio exec Ritchie Steven, then written by KG. A preliminary plot for the following Superman movie has even been discussed.

“With the new product coming and the solid shows already out,” the Flip Brothers source concluded, “we expect to see the studio’s success continue well into 2008.”

Famed director Martin Scorsese, director of 2004’s The Aviator, will bring two of the actors associated with the movie together in a new crime film this month. With the simple title “Money” given to it, Ship of Fooles Studios is presenting Sweet Angel’s newest film on November 23.

Money marks the first HTG movie where Cate Blanchett and Willem Dafoe will co-star in. The two appeared in Scorsese’s The Aviator, plus worked more closely in Wes Anderson’s The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. Also part of the Money cast is Ewan McGregor, Stephen Rea and Charles Dance.

“We’re excited to be presenting this movie,” mentioned an insider at SoF. “SA’s last film, The Greatest Band That Never Was, was a hit. We’re hoping that the magic will return for Money.”

Ship of Fooles is keeping mum so far on the movie’s details, but the studio is promising some soon.

“Just keep an eye out,” the insider said. “And keep an eye out for the other Ship of Fooles releases coming this Autumn. It’s going to be a good season for us and movie lovers out there.”